An Odd Order
by Spyrkle10
Summary: Sora goes on an epic quest spanning two worlds, a Bat Lair, braving the threat of Kairi's wrath, and more in order to figure out why the order is always 'Sora, Donald, and Goofy.'


Sora stared quietly at the twinkling stars overhead, pondering life's greatest questions. Things about memories and hearts and the meaning of existence. However, one question remained prevalent in the teen's mind: just why was the order always the same? No matter where Sora traveled, or how Sora, Donald, and Goofy were positioned, they were always introduced or mentioned in the same order. It was maddening. This had to be more than a coincidence. Even when Mickey had come to hang out with Sora, Kairi, and Riku on Destiny Islands, and had fallen asleep on a bench in the warm sun, he had mumbled in that same order.

Sora continued in this vein of thought for hours, eyes turning red as he stared at the bright stars. Eventually he decided that Yen Sid had to be informed. As the old master knew everything, being an Exposition Master, he had to know about this phenomenon's origins. Sora kept a small Gummi Ship in a small cave for dire times such as these… the only problem was that he'd given the keys to Riku so his friend could go shopping for something called 'aspirin.' Maybe it was something to dampen Riku's dramatic antics. Sora had asked once after a particularly chaotic escapade in which Sora ended up stealing Kairi's red headband and causing a mob of recently imported bulls to rampage, but Riku had stoically walked away, a cloak appearing as a cold wind suddenly blew.

Anyway, Sora reasoned that Riku didn't really need the Gummi Ship keys to buy his favorite vegetable or whatever. They were probably shoved under his bed or in his 'Bat Lair' constructed sometime before Kairi had come to the island, and still managed to cling to life like a cockroach. The old cardboard creation was nigh indestructible. Since it was around 4:30 AM right now, Sora could just sneak in, grab the keys, and consult Yen Sid before Kairi realized that she was one guest short for whatever social event she was trying to rope him into this time. Her attempts to make Sora and Riku 'contributing members of the community' were probably better off being tolerated… Kairi could grab any summoned Keyblade from a poor Keyblade wielder's hands and attack with unyielding ferocity for hours, with intermittent Cures to keep the victim awake and alive.

Then again, maybe Sora should just wait until tomorrow… No! He had to stop the evil plot to… well… do whatever Xehanort was doing this time by keeping the order the same all the time! He began running as fast as he could, bare feet barely brushing against the soft sand. Skidding to a stop after five minutes of intense running, Sora panted, his mouth feeling stiff and his feet pulsing with pain.

"Curaga!" Sora yelled, though a bit quietly. It might have been a tad too much power, as Curaga was probably meant to heal serious injuries instead of mild exhaustion, but it wouldn't hurt to be prepared. Now suitably recovered, Sora made his way into the Bat Lair, a huge structure made of cardboard, wood, and duct tape. Stick figures looking vaguely like Batman and Robin adorned the exterior. The interior itself was far worse. The small rooms built for children were claustrophobic. It was a little known fact that Sora didn't exactly… _enjoy_ dark, small spaces after many hours spent hiding in closets and a year spent in a giant white pod.

"Oh gosh, I'm going to die in here," Sora whispered, his movements becoming more frantic and rushed. He knocked over chairs and fake computers, statues of chewed gum, and far more furniture as he searched, looking under blankets turned into carpets and stuffed animals glued to the ceiling.

"Sora? Are you all right?" a voice calmly asked. Sora screamed. A monster was going to eat him or something! He had to hide, had to run, no, no, wrong way, he couldn't see, he was going to die – "What are you doing?" It was only Riku. A wave of relief passed through him. Wait… he was supposed to be doing this sneakily and secretly.

"Umm… I totally wasn't rooting through this place for the Gummi Ship keys or anything…" Sora casually said, whistling as inconspicuously as possible. Riku snorted.

"Yeah, right. Why do you need the keys?" Riku questioned. His hand immediately slipped into his 'Sora Emergency' bag, which contained aspirin for surprise Sora appearances. He needed the aspirin to deal with Sora's insanity. He couldn't even begin to list the number of times he'd been dragged off on an insane quest to find burritos or some other food craving Sora was having, and then there were Sora's attempts to satiate his hero complex, or save a pretty girl who looked like a damsel in distress who was actually a man, or… well, Sora was nuttier than Chip and Dale's snack box. Riku definitely needed aspirin in advance to deal with Sora's headache-inducing behavior.

"I was just thinking that whenever people mention or introduce me and my friends, it's always 'Sora, Donald, and Goofy.' Always in that order. I need to ask Yen Sid about it. It's gotta be Xehanort's latest evil plot," Sora explained. Riku's hand came up empty. He was out of aspirin. Shoot. Now he would have to deal with Sora and a terrible headache. Joy. And all he had done was fall asleep watching the latest Transformers movie in the Bat Lair. Life was definitely handing him sour lemons today.

"Okay, let's go," Riku commanded, sighing. Sora nodded, grinning. Riku dangled the keys in front of Sora for a moment before taking off. The brunette quickly raced after him. It wasn't fair that Riku had a head start! They really did need Kairi to set the rules. The Gummi Ship was about ten minutes away though. Far too long for a proper race.

"Balloonga!" Sora called out, using the balloons to propel himself forward. However, he ended up in the water. Spitting out the seawater he'd swallowed, Sora decided against using magic to get to the Gummi Ship and simply ran. Then he had a long argument with Riku about who should drive, eventually winning due to an exceedingly long rant about how Riku was like a newborn kitten at driving.

"Sora! Why aren't you destroying all the enemy ships?" Riku whined, his perfectionist nature being clearly demonstrated.

"Because that would take forever!" Sora answered angrily, the ship swerving around enemies and obstacles. Riku dismissed Sora's response easily, continuing to complain until they finally arrived at the tower. The duo managed to stumble off, nauseous from Sora's terrible driving. Suddenly, a police Gummi Ship landed, alarms blaring.

"Just what did you think you were doin'?" Cid asked, wearing a police uniform. "Goin' at seven gazillion pixels per minute is far too fast! You could have injured some poor pedestrian!" the blond cautioned.

"Um, Cid? I doubt that anyone walks around in between worlds," Sora sheepishly commented.

"Never mind. I was never here. Never," Cid murmured, visibly frustrated at his failed attempt to instill order into Gummi Ship traffic. Sora and Riku shrugged before walking into the tower and climbing up the huge staircase.

"Why do… you think… it's so… long… Riku?" Sora asked in between gulps of sweet air as he collapsed at the top. He was out of shape, as playing on a warm island world was not ideal for maintaining physical conditioning. Riku made an odd grunting noise and rose to his feet. Yen Sid himself was sleeping in his chair, snoring obnoxiously. The sight distracted Sora from his original question. He wondered if the old man was glued to the chair.

Sadly, the wizard woke up before Sora could test his hypothesis. "Welcome Sora, Riku. I trust you have a good reason for coming here?" Yen Sid greeted, his beard tangled with all sorts of objects formerly on his desk. Riku respectfully lowered his head and opened his mouth to speak, but Sora interrupted.

"Exposition Master Yen Sid, we have a problem! I just realized that whenever people mention or introduce me, Donald, and Goofy, they always do it in the same order! Do you know why?" Sora demanded. Yen Sid laughed, while Riku loudly gasped at Sora's impudence.

"A long time ago, in a world far away, a company made a video game called Official Crossover, involving a boy traveling with two talking animals to save his friends from dark ugly trolls. While testing the game, scientists found that people were too lazy to remember the names of the main characters that the player controls, and decided that putting the names in a specific order would help. Then a Deus Ex Machina occurred and now it randomly afflicts groups of three," Yen Sid monologued.

Yen Sid stroked his beard while Sora took in the information. "So… we have to go stop a giant heartless in a world called Official Crossover?" Sora asked, summoning Kingdom Key. Yen Sid facepalmed.

"Riku, can I have some of your delightful aspirin?" Yen Sid pleaded. Riku then pulled two out of his 'Sora Emergency Emergency' pouch, and handed them to Yen Sid. Sora yawned and left to get pizza, stranding Riku…

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 **The fact that the order is always 'Sora, Donald, Goofy' is very odd. A friend of mine finds it hilarious.**


End file.
